Gestation: 20weeks

Luca and I went baby browsing at the weekend to look at cots and pushchairs and breast pumps, a little premature perhaps but we didn’t buy anything, we just wanted to size up our space and know what to look for and expect. Luca looked like a giant in a smurf village when he stood cautiously amongst all the teeny tiny baby clothes and miniature beds with his eyebrows raised and sweat falling from his brow when he saw the price tags! But after ten or so minutes of me stroking the cribs and cooing over baby baths he began to relax and followed Mummy sheep into the cave of treasure that was the pushchairs and travel systems! I got to business clicking the buttons and pulling the locks to try and open, convert and collapse the frames of the pushchairs wondering just how hard it would be to get it into the boot of the car in the rain, on top of a hill and in a hurry before the school run. Being the hands on person that Luca is he couldn’t resist pushing a three-wheeler little black number about and it melted my heart! He satisfied his need to talk gadgets and cars with the baby seat specialist who talked him through bases to click car seats onto. And finally we finished up by sizing up a pretty lovely cot that converts to a toddler bed, and it was such a lovely trip, in fact his favourite shopping trip because we didn’t spend a penny! We wanted to wait until after our scan and the start of next year to begin buying all the bits we need so that the time is closer and not to jinx anything. So roll on 2012!

Well naturally I didn’t get a wink of sleep last night I was far too excited to even close my eyes and by this morning I looked like an old dishcloth. I suddenly remember what it feels like being five years old waiting for Christmas morning perched on the edge of the bed trying not to wet yourself with excitement and finally the day has arrived that we have our 20wk scan and find out the sex of our baby and it feels like it’s taken years. I was petrified that I’d forget something and they’d have to cancel and rebook for next year, or something would go wrong and the machines would have a power cut and we wouldn’t be able to find out. But the morning went so well, with the countdown to being due back at work closing in our appointment actually went smoothly I was amazed.

I had boy vibes in my head all the way there and gave my bump a good talking to, trying to sit on the fence and not make the little bean feel guilty for being a girl, but pleading with it to be a boy. And in the waiting room I studied the pictures of babies forming at different weeks of age that were displayed on the wall, seeing how far we had come and how close we were to meeting our little one. Finally they called my name and I actually squeaked out loud and had such a psycho grin on my face as I eagerly followed the sonographer into the room in danger of actually getting under her feet and tripping her over through pure enthusiasm. And spookily enough her name was also Tracy and she had three sons, so she was definitely the best person to be telling us the news!

Luca sat on the ‘partners chair’ in prime position to see the screen and I lay back with my gelled up bump merrily trying to crane my neck to see the screen. I couldn’t take it any longer and before she checked all the bones and measurements I just had to know if it was a boy or a girl first. As she paused and looked closer at the screen moving her hand piece about and clicking my heart felt like it had stopped and I was too nervous to even breath incase I missed it. And then she said the words we had longed to hear, “It’s a boy!” Luca and I actually squealed like two loons and had the biggest widest grin on our faces in sheer amazement, for something that we have loved and wanted so much to actually come true and everything be ok, we feel like the luckiest people alive to have our dreams answered. Ever since I was a little girl I’d always dreamed of the perfect family, a happy marriage, a little daughter and son, a dog and a house with fruit trees in the garden, and now we have it all. Two beautiful children and more love than all of the cars on the M25 and beyond!

Our Beautiful Baby Boy!

The sonographer then went on to check the bones, heart, organs and face. She took all of her measurements and completed all of her notes and that was it! Job done! She let us have a look at our son moving about and we watched starry eyed as he opened and closed his mouth and wiggled his feet in the air, and although it was a fuzzy black and white scan already he looks so beautiful and perfect to us.

And when we got home my mum had already told Millie the news as we had phoned from the car park. she was a little bit disappointed to not have a little sister bless her, I think she’d really set her heart on having a little sister as her life-long best friend, but when we told her how much her brother will love her and need lots of cuddles and want to learn to paint and play games she soon let out a lovely smile. She’s feeling very grown up and important just now, being the cool big sister in charge of maturity and telling right from wrong. It’s a big title to live up to for a 4yr old girl but we know she’ll be amazing.

So our son, Garbriele Angelo Tivadar Di-Zeonbia – Kiss has single-handedly taken care of Christmas, all we wanted was to know all was ok and we’ve been given so much more! We are the proudest and happiest little family in the entire world right now, official! And to top it off our little baby bunnies came hopping into the garden today and haven’t stopped running around on the grass since, they look so tiny like pretend rabbits. Millie is in her element picking them up and giving them little tickles, they’re eating bunny mix now so they should start growing a lot quicker, we just don’t want to have to let them go, it would be lovely to keep them all but I’m sure we’ll find them all good homes soon. And at work today after our scan Luca and I couldn’t stop calling each other and texting to say how excited we were, sometimes I question who the child is, Millie or us! x x x x

 

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Tracy Kiss

Social influencer, Bodybuilder, Mother, Vegan
London, UK

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