Did somebody say roller coaster? I swear each week that passes since the start of 2014 is getting more eccentric than the previous if that’s even possible. At the weekend I attended a friends hen-do in Aylesbury for a Grease night with thirty girls dressed as the Pink Ladies and it was fantastic. I hadn’t been to town on a night out in over a year, and without wanting to make a big deal about it, I stayed away from local nightlife because I was told not to go out by my ex fiance when he left. Not that I ever went out anyway when I was engaged, but I was told not be anywhere he might be, not to speak to his friends and not to contact him online or in person. Basically he wanted a get out of jail free card to walk away from me and the children and to not have to answer any questions nor explain his actions. And me being the butternut squash that I am, I did as I was told, heartbroken and healing just days after my breast reconstruction surgery, I took all the crap without question and let him relive his youth. I kept away, I gave him his immunity and I stayed in with the children instead, whether he deserved it or not. In hindsight, I would have loved to have flip reversed a peace sign and deliberately gone out drinking every night meeting new people and making a drunken fool of myself whether he was there or not, but that wouldn’t have helped matters. I didn’t want to start a battle of who goes where and who talks to who, so I stayed at home like a good little spinster and took care of my children.
Therefore this weekend was my first experience of being out locally in a very long time, which is insane considering town is only a few miles away from my home, but when I’ve been out shopping or for food I’ve always raced back before curfew so as not to bump into anybody and step on any toes. With the hen do being in town all afternoon and evening last weekend it was something that I couldn’t control. And I’m glad I went because I had such a great time with such amazing people. I used to work weekends at a few bars in town in my late teens between studying and my 9-5, so I knew a lot of faces and always had a laugh. Fast forward several years and I probably knew about four people out of a thousand, when did everybody get so young!? I felt like a bit of a dinosaur queuing in the toilets with all of the five-foot-nothing eighteen year old girls talking about learning to drive and readjusting their push up bras. I rolled my eyes and reminded myself that I’ve got mix tapes from the radio older than them, sank a few more glasses of wine and then danced the rest of the night away completely oblivious to society like some embarrassing old mum riding a rocking horse. And when I woke up the next morning face down on my bed and fully clothed, my phone was full of messages, missed calls and generous dinner requests.
The local anonymous networking site The Aylesbury Grapevine on Facebook was in overdrive, predominantly giving me hilarious compliments, but there was one person who felt the need to have a dig by mentioning the title of a magazine I was in this week with the article titled “I swear I’m not vain” following my breast reconstruction when my PIP silicone implants leaked. There’s always one who has to spoil it isn’t there!? They felt the need to tell me to put some clothes on and stop trying to be an ‘Aylesbury celebrity’; which I would imagine they’re either referring to me charting my daily fitness blog and working out in hot pants and a sports bra, or my pictures in a bikini from holiday or in underwear for my latest modelling pictures on a motorbike?
And the idea of me trying to be an Aylesbury celebrity, well I have no idea where they got that from? Perhaps they saw me in a national woman’s magazine this week, or on Sky1 for a comedy show I took part in? Or maybe they actually saw me out in town for the first time since the dinosaurs walked the earth and thought I was pushing my luck for mingling with the public. Somebody calling you a local celebrity is about as offensive as thinking it yourself in the first place. If anybody wanted to be a celebrity then surely they’d aim to be world renowned and not set their sights on conquering just a single postcode. The only reason I’m not out in public very often is because I’m a single parent to two young children and have too much responsibility keeping me from partying and being reckless. It certainly doesn’t mean that I think I’m too good for the local area, nor that I have ideas above my station of my place in society. I’m just a regular village girl who happens to have worked within the media over the years. No big deal. And I can guarantee you, if I was out partying in town every weekend like other twenty-six year old girls my age, and if I did actually recognise lots of names and regular faces, then the exact same bulletin would have been posted about me saying “put some clothes on and stop trying to be a local celebrity.” You’re damned if you do and you’re damned if you don’t. Oh well.
I also received some pictures back from a bridal company that I shot with last month, and I absolutely love the natural soft lighting and grand architecture of the mansion and it’s beautiful gardens. It’s amazing how a single picture can capture a moment in time forever and preserve every intricate detail, telling a story that a thousand words wouldn’t even come close to. I am fortunate to take part in such interesting and amazing opportunities and to meet such incredible and like-minded people. It’s one thing to have passion in life, and it’s another to take action.
I have just one week left of my P90X3 bodybuilding training, which is a three month program from America that I’ve been reviewing. It’s insane how much it’s changed my fitness since I first started, and maybe this picture is a pretty random example, but I think it shows the extent of what I’ve achieved so far. I’m no longer scrawny and thin, but strong and muscular. I have put on a stone in weight from bulking up and turning my body rock hard, my balance has never been better and I am less clumsy as a result. And finally my flexibility would make a pretzel look straight. Three months ago there is no way I could have balanced with my leg over my shoulder, and now it’s a complete breeze. I see life as a challenge that we must all undertake with the intention of bettering our understanding and ability day by day. To know that I can push myself, turn the impossible possible and step out of my comfort zone brings me a great sense of freedom; the freedom to achieve my dreams and realise that the sky is the limit. Who knows what I will be able to do in another three months time, three years or three decades? But I sure can’t wait to find out!
And whilst we’re on the topic of pushing limits, I went snowboarding this week and had the best time. I’m turning into the ultimate adrenaline junky, and have always loved theme parks and fast cars, but now I’m branching into sports and the world of testosterone and it’s incredibly addictive. I have already turned my hand to yoga, pilates, bodybuilding, shotguns, motorbikes, snowboarding, racing and MMA, and next on my list I plan to sky dive and rock climb. A girls gotta do what a girls gotta do!
This week was also my dad’s birthday and the children had a great time making him a card and some chocolate cakes which they decorated with sugar sprinkles and candles. It is so cute to see them working together as a team, setting up thoughtful surprises for their Granddad and jumping around like Easter bunnies through sheer excitement and love. And after partying all day they both curled up and fell fast asleep in my arms, my baby cubs, my angels and my world. It’s times like this in the evening when the world grounds to a halt and everything falls silent, that these precious moments mean so much to me. To watch my children sleeping, and to wonder how amazing it must be to see the world through a child’s eyes. The innocence of youth and the effervescent outlook on everything they see and do. They look so peaceful as they dream without a care in the world, I could watch them forever and a day, gently stroking their faces and soaking up every last drop of love. This to me means more than anything, being with my children and giving them my time and love. How anyone could ever choose partying and pointless mundane activities over being with your babies absolutely stuns me. They make my heart melt with just a simple smile, hearing them call my name and fit their tiny little hands inside mine when we walk together, there is no greater feeling on this earth than being a mother. I am truly blessed and always will be.
The Toothfairy has been taking her time to pay Millie a visit recently, as her front tooth has been wibbling and wobbling for a few weeks now. Poor Millie is finding it difficult to chew her food, one minute her tooth bends outwards and the next her mouth and neck are covered in blood from it twisting around, but still it seems to be hanging on for dear life. I hope that she gets her strong gums from her Mummy, as I’m sure when I’ve hit a ripe old age without the need to have dentures I’ll be the local nursing home celebrity of pearly whites!
Millie had a trip to the doctors again this week when her water infection returned, and she received her second course of antibiotics in as many months. I’ve been encouraging her to drink more water to flush out her toxins and am always mindful of her personal hygiene to ensure she doesn’t get poorly, but she’s had a tough old time with tummy pains recently bless her, and I hope the antibiotics clear it up quickly. She does however love taking her delicious sweet medicine, and always tries to hide the excitement on her face but hanging her head and following me around like a sheep dog as she tries to say in her most monotonous voice “Mummy, I’ve finished my breakfast/dinner, I suppose I should have my medicine now then?” I know that it tastes delicious because it smells like a sweet shop on a sunny day, and it really isn’t a chore for her at all, but for some reason children always seem to view taking medicine as some sort of punishment. And when I say to Millie, “Ooh, it’s time for your yummy medicine!” she always tries to play it down and fein disappointment “Not again!” all the while the corners of her mouth are curling and she’s licking her lips, funny little thing, anyone would think she avoids drinking water just so that she can take her medicine. Hmm…