Just A Thought

Writing a blog is such an amazing thing to do and share with others, you can express your emotions and dreams in a way that people can take time to read and others can understand things that you might not have been able to get across in a two minute conversation alone.

I’d like to hope that my blog will be read by young mothers, singletons, married couples, older generations, youngsters, men, women and nuns even; as I believe all ages, race and creed can benefit from understanding others and what they are going through at certain points in their life. I also hope that it may help others to explore new things in life, appreciate the good things that each and everyone of us are blessed with in life and to share in the tears and the joy along with me on my special journey of life.

When I write my blog it can be hard not to go off on a tangent sometimes and talk about other things that happen in my personal life that are outside of the purpose of my blog. When I write about my daughter for example it’s completely irrelevant to talk about my brother’s future mortgage and I would like to think people looking for a mortgage advice blog wouldn’t be annoyed that they haven’t found it in my daughter’s blog! Therefore, when I write about my children I focus on them alone and not others.

I also try my best to respect others privacy because for myself, I know that I would be a bit cautious to find somebody writing about me and putting pictures of me online that I had no prior knowledge of; and for this reason if there are other people in my pictures I hide their identity by blurring or covering faces, when I mention friends I try not to include names or locations and if I go to parties and events I try not to list those involved. It’s not that these people aren’t important to the children or me, it’s because this is a blog not a soap opera, and I write about Luca, our two children and myself because this is a blog about my family and not others. Everybody has the ability to write a blog and it’s not my place to do it on anyone else’s behalf.

That being said I would imagine it could be quite difficult for those who know me to read my blog and think “Oh my God she’s writing that about me!” but unfortunately I’m sorry to say the thought hadn’t even crossed my mind, not because I don’t care, but because I only write for myself and my children. I might talk about having a nice time with Luca and the kids at the zoo but fail to mention that my mum bought me a pair of my favourite shoes for my birthday, and Mum if you’re reading this it doesn’t mean that I’m not grateful for my shoes, it just didn’t fit the purpose of my blog and if I wrote about everything irrelevant then I may as well just sit on Facebook all day instead.

So for those of you (unfortunate few) who know me personally or know of me 🙂 I’m not a story teller, I’m a blog writer and when I talk about things that I’d like to do with Luca or the children, it isn’t to avoid or ignore you, it isn’t to say I don’t want to see you or that you’re not important to me, it’s because I respect you and your privacy and it would take me too long to write about everybody I know and who I speak to on a daily basis.

And I know that sometimes, ok, perhaps most of the time, I can stress about having hairy legs, being left to do the housework and juggle the children with no time to myself, but that’s life. I love my fiancé and children to bits but what use is a blog without honesty? How would this be an account of my life if I pretended it was any different to what it is? This isn’t fiction, it’s not fantasy, and you definitely won’t find it on a bookshelf; my blog is unwritten until each day that happens and I deliver it to you as an account of my world.

And I can totally appreciate that my world may seem extremely out of touch and small minded compared to others lives. I could spend a morning tittering on about the cost of nappies and how long my washing machine takes to spin dry before I can go to the food store, when there are soldiers fighting wars across the world and people in hospital beds fighting for their lives every day. And here I am trying to get a six-pack and feel good about myself once more after having children on my maternity leave. But you have to read what I write in perspective of my life not your own. I have a lot of people around me who I love and respect, with everybody fighting their own battles, having their own demons to defeat and their own reasons for feeling insecure. I’m not here to compare my life to others, just to share mine with you.

I’m also not trying to alienate people, unless your name is Luca and you leave the loo seat up when I tell you not to, in which case I hope you will feel completely alienated and change your ways if you’re reading this! The reason I feel able to talk about my relationship with Luca is because he’s happy for me to. Everything I say in my blog I say to his face first and we can laugh and joke and love together and then it finds it’s way to these pages shortly after.

When I started writing this blog I was contemplating keeping my identity anonymous because I wondered how people would react to my opinions on life and the things that I write. I was half expecting to be called single-minded, immature, ridiculous and self-obsessed for wanting to share my account of life with others, when in fact I could be all of them or none of them but who is anyone to judge me aside from the people in my life who know me? I settled upon owning up to my writing and putting my name and face to my words because I see no reason not to. The internet can be a place of faceless bullies who all become brave and abusive online but never to peoples faces, whereas I am here for you as myself, just me as I am to all who know me. I wondered if I should include details of Luca and asked if it was acceptable to mention his name and he didn’t see a problem, and when Gabriele was born he asked me why I hadn’t included pictures of him in my blog and I genuinely didn’t think he’d have wanted me to, so now I do.

I think there is also a danger when reading silent text online in a blog, because much like a text message or email you can never truly tell how others will receive it. Will they think you’re mad, sarcastic or patronising in what was meant to be a compliment or praise? Well there is no way to tell, because a hundred people will read the same piece of text and all take it to mean a different thing. And when you talk to somebody about something you’ve read online and raise an eyebrow as to what has been said, make a phone call or leave a comment online, that again can be taken in a different way by other people than to what you’ve intended yourself. But do you know what I think? I think people read what they want to read, they see what they choose to see and they respond how they want to respond, and as a blog writer what can you do about it? Absolutely nothing!

And if you’re thinking of writing a blog yourself I’d say definitely do it because it’s a wonderful and beautiful experience to share with others and something to have to look back on one day. It doesn’t matter what you write about, so long as you love to write. And if you’re not good with words then a blog is absolutely for you, because writing things down and getting your emotions out is the best free therapy ever!

And for people who read my blog and know me, firstly I hope you’re enjoying it, I hope you’re laughing along with me and at me also, and I hope you’ve been offended at least four times or something must be seriously wrong with my sense of humour.

I spoke to the local news today about informing the public about my blog site and it’s recent launch and for half a second I suddenly worried about strangers who might recognise me in the street and what they might think of me if they read this, and then I laughed and hoped they’d come up to me and tell me about their stretch marks and sleepless nights too! I’m either incredibly stupid, brave or naive to open my life for the dissection and criticism of others, but ask yourself this, would you be able to do the same?