Age: 5months & 3days

Ok so that totally crushed my happy workout hype when I discovered that I didn’t actually run twelve miles on my Semtex trial run at all as gym machines count in kilometres not miles apparently! Whoops, school-girl error if ever there was one; so it actually works out that I ran 7.8miles instead, which doesn’t have the same kind of oh-my-goshness as twelve miles but it beats an evening of sitting on the sofa eating sour cream pringles I guess so hey-ho.

I also totally forgot that the local news came out yesterday and headed for the petrol station this morning with great anticipation to buy the paper to see what went in. There was a major local drugs bust that filled up all of the headlines this week and as such the news editor told me it would just be a small piece in the paper and a bit more included online which was sweet of them to do.

I was a little apprehensive as to what they would write and also if they had included a picture or not as I hadn’t sent them any and the ones in my blog can be a little random at times. So leafing through the pages of the paper I was giddy with nerves looking for the article and when I saw it I stopped dead in my tracks, my mouth fell open and I let out a blood-curdling “Noooooo!” as one word sprung immediately to mind: SCROTUM!

A Small Dogs Scrotum Or A Double Chin?

Ah yes, this would be a picture of my double chin from several months ago when I was heavily pregnant and around four stones more lardy than I am today, and not actually a scrotum of a small canine much to my dismay. And my nose/beak, oh dear Lord I can’t believe this picture even exists in the same article as the words “former glamour model” ha! The shame of it! But it brought a smile to my face as I cringed and hid the paper behind me, then stopped laughing and looked again, cringing like it was a guilty pleasure, you want to look but you know you shouldn’t. I hoped each time that I saw it, it may get a little bit better and not look so bad, but no, it stayed bad! 🙂 They obviously had some stock photos from when they did a feature on our Youtube channel launching and receiving 60,000 views in the first month, which since then we have had 1,074,854 views to date and are incredibly pleased; but my God, a scrotum chin in the newspaper is never acceptable. But you never know, it may bring in more readers looking for rude blogs!

Snippet From The Bucks Herald Newspaper About My Blog Launch This Week

Web Feature On The Bucks Herald This Week About My New Blog Launch

And after that we headed out for Luca’s day off; the school run, shopping in the city, cooking and chores back home, and with a visit from Luca’s mum to watch the kiddies, a cheeky trip to the gym to top it all off. Ah what a perfect day. And at the gym I tried something a little new and decided to branch out with my machine loyalty and try the stepper and spinning today as well as my trusty cross-trainer and leg press, weight bench and free weights. I motored on with the support of my trusty Semtex and feel great now that I’m home, showered and in a nice snuggly dressing gown with Gabriele nestled on my tummy fast asleep bless him.

Poor Gabriele caught his first cold this week, at five months old which I think isn’t too bad for the fact that he could have been ill a lot sooner as babies don’t always have great immune systems so young. So his little nose has been blocked for the last couple of days and when he sleeps he sounds like an out of tune recorder whistling a tune; his chest is heavy and gargles as he lays on his back at night, and he’s been choked, puffy and fidgety throughout the day, yet he hasn’t stopped smiling at all and is always cheerful bless him. It’s horrible to see little ones ill but there’s nothing we can do, other than give him 2.5ml of infant calpol a couple of times a day to try and soothe him long enough to sleep at night. It’s sadly a waiting game until he’s better, but as this is his second day he’s shown a great improvement so hopefully by tomorrow he may be back to his usual self.

Gabriele Ill With His First Cold At 5 Months

Although none of us are ill at home we think it might be the change in weather from warm and sunny to suddenly sharp and cold that made him bad, or the fact that he is constantly dribbling and sucking his fists so much that he drenches himself in dribble around his neck and chest and we’re changing his bib and baby grow up to three times a day to try to keep him dry.

Body wise I’m still feeling drained from my period which appears to be easing off now despite the aches and pains remaining; naturally I wouldn’t expect anything less than a full scale war from my ovaries, and I hope they realise they’re no longer on my Christmas card list as a result of their behaviour. I’m gradually feeling a millimetre more toned each time I go to the gym and do more weights, yet my bingo wings and thunder thighs can still give KFC a good run for it’s money so I won’t give up on my membership this side of this decade. I’m finding I can up the resistance on the gym machines now and still maintain my times, and I was sickeningly cheerful to have lifted 105K on the leg press today. Exactly what unit a ‘K’ is I’m not sure? I think it may be kilos? Other k words could be kilograms, or is that the same thing? Or possibly Kilimanjaro’s? I’m still not quite savvy with my gym-lingo just yet. So if anyone asks I plan to conveniently cough and clear my throat at the same time that I mention unit values *cough*tweleve miles/meters/lightyears*cough* 🙂 oh dear!

And as a final thought, I wonder if anybody has discovered my site yesterday or today as a result of seeing my facial genitalia in the news, and more importantly what they think of my blog? So, if you are joining me for the first time please say hello, let me know what you think and I hope that you enjoy having a look around.

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Tracy Kiss

Social influencer, Bodybuilder, Mother, Vegan
London, UK

2 CommentsLeave a comment

    • Taking one for the team there! I dare say after I gave birth I also gave back one of my chins, although if I laugh too hard or try to look down at my nose I may still expose a small amount of scrotum still! x

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